Liverpool Q&A Jokes

Q: Why will Liverpool never win the League?
A: They keep scoring Owen goals.

Q: How many Liverpool fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Yeah, as if they have electricity in Liverpool.

Q: What’s is the differance between Pamela Anderson and the Liverpool goal?
A: Pam’s only got two tits in front of her.

Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an intelligent Liverpool supporter and an old drunk are walking down the street together when simultaneously they each spot a fifty quid note. Who gets it?
A: The old drunk, of course - the other 3 are mythical creatures.

Q: What do Pool Fans and sperm have in common?
A: One in 2.000.000 has a chance of becoming a human being.

Q: How can you tell a level headed Liverpool supporter?
A: He dribbles from both sides of his mouth - at the same time.

Q: What do you get if you cross a Liverpol fan with a pig?
A: Thick bacon.

Q: What do you get if you cross a Monkey with a Liverpudlian?
A: Nothing. The monkeys are far too clever to screw a Liverpudlian.

Q: What is the difference between a battery and a Scowser fan?
A: A battery has a positive side.

Q: Why do Sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
A: So they ain’t mistaken fur a Liverpudlian women.

Q: Why did Beardsley never play in Scotland?
A: Cos he wiz afraid of the Bells (Scottish Premier).

74 Comments

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By Anonymous on November 1, 2007 @ 1:15 pm

XXXXXXXXLIVERPOOL IS THE BESTXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

By Aditya on November 5, 2007 @ 8:59 pm

Shut the F*** up you *****!

Liverpool rocks.

Fatass Fergie’s squad only has 2 CL,16 EPL,s

Liverpool has 5 CL,18 EPL’s

By anonymous on November 25, 2007 @ 6:07 am

liverpool r da best liverpool till i die!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:) woop woop

By lfc fan on January 16, 2008 @ 9:46 am

whoever made these jokes r ***. they can eat their own balls and go **** them selves.
man u r full of ****. i h8 man u. and i will neva lyk them. man u r full of scum. and every body knows it.

By Anonymous on April 5, 2008 @ 3:12 am

um um um, to all u liverFool suckers. face the truth man utd is way better.we beat u idiots 3-0 ……url can say what url want about us .but we the better team……………………………………….n by the way we beat Arsenal 4-0 we did not draw with them….if url are so good then y dont url show the world???????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????????  ???????????????????????????????????

By Keagz on April 5, 2008 @ 3:28 am

um um um. y all u liverFool people talk so much????? url say that we suck but we beat u idiots 3-0 …………url just suck…..url say url are the best in the world but url not showing nothing. we beat arsenal 4-0 we didnt draw with them like u fools .so say what url want to say about us but MAnchester is the best in the world and we are showing every1 what we can do 3-0 man utd vs liverpool .4-0 man utd vs arsenal. 2-0 man utd vs roma, 5-0 man utd vs newcastle, 7-1 man utd vs roma . 4-0 man utd vs aston villa. 3-0 man utd vs fulham

By Anonymous on April 15, 2008 @ 8:50 am

if u not mank ur a wank aka liverpool sucks balls

By Anonymous on April 15, 2008 @ 8:59 am

liverpool fans are so ugly there parents named them **** happens

By Eli on April 29, 2008 @ 12:07 pm

LIVERPOOL IS DA BEST SO R ALL SCOUSERS…I FKIN H8 MAN UTD :@ GRR….LOLL GO LFCCCCCCC XXXXXXXXXXXX

By liverpool 1996- til i die on April 29, 2008 @ 5:35 pm

wat the hell all the jokes are stupid . torres is way freaking better the ronaldo if he took care of his hair more people will talk about and hell he might win an award like the player of year

By aaron on June 12, 2008 @ 3:03 am

liverpool r scum wankers they r **** man till i die liverpool scum *****

By chyampion on November 25, 2008 @ 5:16 pm

they r funny jokes

By MAN ROC on December 28, 2008 @ 4:02 pm

Hi all u liverpool **** if u go for liverpool u must be really dumb, they suck there team mates balls if they have any

By MAN ROC on December 28, 2008 @ 4:06 pm

Q: wat is the difference between a hurt dog on the road and a hurt liverpool player on the road.
A: their are skid marks in front of the dog

By Anonymous on January 3, 2009 @ 12:55 am

LOL!!! look at you dumbass scouser fans.. actually thinking u guys are gonna win the league.. why is your song you’ll never walk alone!? cos you are all fucken scared to b alone.. **** eyed ******* with a napolean complex.. u represent nonsense.. liverpool shake to dat, u the best in the business i can’t tell.. who the **** is stevie g? oh **** he’s the underage ***** on the rkelly tape being peed on..

By Anonymous on January 3, 2009 @ 12:56 am

Callum Lee Westehad u shud goto the lfc academy u mink twat.. atleast then u can get bummd by all ur fav players.. stupid fucken doos..

By Anonymous on January 10, 2009 @ 11:33 am

hillsborough was only a disaster coz not enough of the twats were wiped out!

By man united rocks on April 10, 2009 @ 4:29 am

yo aditya..u guys never won the EPL dude..yes u l’pool has won the league a long long time ago many times but since the EPL was introduced, u guys never won it even once..and now u jst f***ed up your CL chances by losing 3-1 at home to Chelsea..so in fact, u guys really do suck balls cos u were never consistent..play excellent football, beat MU a couple of times but at the end of the day people remember champions..and u guys havent won anything substantial for a long time..

By cfc fa cup on June 7, 2009 @ 8:53 am

liverpool are scum face it. benetez is a ****. Liverpool won nothing FACT lolololololhahahahahahahahhaa

By tttttttttttazzzzzz797979797 on August 2, 2009 @ 1:18 pm

MAN UTD RULE
Q.What’s the difference between Batman and a Scouser?
A.Batman can go anywhere without Robin

GO SUCK YA SELVES DURTY SCOUSERS

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